airports.

And I'm back in the airport. Some people I know loathe airports, but I love them, which I suppose is a good thing, given how often I've been in them over the past 2 months. It's such a limbo and transitional space. You're not home anymore, but you're not at your destination yet. You're waiting at some point in between. The waiting can be a nice time to think and people watch (people transform into entirely different creatures in airports! I've seen businessmen dissolve into tears upon discovering their flight was overbooked. And best friends, who were earlier gushing over how much fun they're going to have at x destination, get into heated verbal duals over who will get the window seat because, "damnit, Theresa, you always get the window! You're such an only child!"). Or it can be annoying with children screaming (I do love kids but that is not cute) for candy from the duty free, and obnoxious tourists taking flash photos in your face to remember their exciting (?) time spent at the boarding gate. Yea. Airports are interesting places.

I'm heading to Dumaguete now on the island of Negros. The only research that I've done on this place was hostel-related, so I really have no idea what to expect. Other than constant rain (yay, typhoon season!). And that I have to visit the twin lakes and go to a certain awesome restaurant, both enthusiastically suggested by my Auntie, who at this point I have learned to trust with anything travel-related.

I have a month left of my travels, which is pretty ridiculous to realize. A month left and I'm back home in the states. Weeeeeird. A month left of denial & avoidance of the real world. And then- A JOB. Ewww. I must say though, after this extended vacation, and after spending pretty much all my savings, I'm looking forward to getting into the working grind again. It's been strange not working actually, after holding down 2 jobs in college. The idleness has been and continues to be a bit unnerving. I always feel like I need to be doing something, preferably something (legally) for money. I'm sure I'll feel relieved once I get back to work. And then I'll get restless and wanderlustful again. Grass is always greener!

Okay, flight is boarding. And really, I will write about Japan.

rewind: japanese food.

Okay. After 2 weeks, I am finally writing about Japan. Due to a combination of things (I'm lazy, waaay too much happened in that country, I'm lazy, it was a while ago, I really am just the laziest) I'm going to write in the form of lists. Somehow, I feel like that's appropriate for Japan anyway, what with their love for orderliness & organization.

FOOD was a huge part of my trip in Japan. My Auntie, with whom I traveled along with 2 of her friends, is an adventurous eater, always eager to try something new & often buying things before knowing what they are. (For instance, one night she proudly tossed a package to me while announcing, "Look! Look at what I bought!" The packaging was all in Japanese characters and the picture was of a nondescript but very nice looking farm. Lacking context clues I asked her what it was. She shrugged saying she had no idea but she was going to cook it, eat it, and totally enjoy it. She's awesome.) It's really thanks to her that my international pallet expanded as much as it did. I practically owe her my first born, a country and probably a small planet for all that she did for me in Japan. Like I said, she's AWESOME. So, food:

1. Sushi. Obvi. On our last day in Japan, we got up in the wee hours of the morning (4am!) to check out the Tsukiji fish market. It's a huge market in Tokyo, famous for, among other things, the tuna auction & the delicious sushi. The tuna auction is a closed event, only open to the first 140 people that get there. We unfortunately didn't make the cut & thus did not see the GINORMOUS tuna, tuna that could easily eat me and then have my aunt for dessert. And then probably a small child as a belated appetizer. I imagined all the tuna rolls a single fish could make- infinite tuna rolls! Which brings me back to the sushi. The sushi & sashimi at the market were AMAZING. The fish was just caught that morning and was fresh, sweet and such a vibrant color. The only thing that I wasn't wild about was the wasabi that was mixed into the rice. I kept crying and my nose burned most uncomfortably whenever I stumbled upon a wasabi bomb. But my sinuses were delightfully cleared by the end of the meal. Silver lining!

2. Okonomiyaki. n. A Japanese savory pancake containing a variety of ingredients (ours had cabbage, egg, onions, noodles, & seafood). The name is derived from the word okonomi, meaning "what you like" or "what you want", and yaki meaning "grilled" or "cooked." SO GOOD. My Auntie went absolutely crazy over this dish and was like a kid at Christmas, glowing with glee and anticipation, when we went to a restaurant that specially served it in Hiroshima. If you're unfamiliar with my big food rule, here it is: I cannot eat/have great difficulty eating foods that resemble what they were when alive, eg. squid, octopus. But! I was able to eat BOTH in okonomiyaki, largely because they were hidden away in the pancake layers. They tasted okay, but I don't think I was really missing out on much during my regular non-squid-&-octopus eating days. But the okonomiyaki over all was delicious and I would eat it forever.

3. Ramen. I had both miso & soy sauce based ramen, and loved both! I did like the miso more, though. It was creamier and not nearly as salty. I think though, more than I enjoyed my noodles, I enjoyed watching locals eat ramen. Everyone in Japan must have throats lined with steel or must have lost all sensory nerves in their throats & mouths because they devoured this stuff in seconds. Seconds. I watched with fascination as businessmen sat, lifted gigantic bowls to their mouths and just continuously shoveled down boiling hot noodles and soup in a dizzy blur. They'd be done in less than 10 minutes. It was really quite impressive! I wanted to high five them, or flash them a peace sign, but something told me that wasn't kosher.

4. Fried mochi. n. Japanese cake made of glutinous rice pounded into paste and molded into shape. I had only ever had mochi with icecream before Japan, so fried mochi was something new. And I became addicted. The ones I ate most often were rolled into balls and put on skewers. Some were topped with red bean paste, others with powdered sugar, some were tempura-ized... all delicious!

5. Bento meals. They usually consist of rice, vegetables, & a meat dish, but fancy-shmancy ones may also include soup and salad. But it's the presentation
(observe exhibit a & exhibit b) & the preparation of them that makes them so awesome. At the restaurants, I was first struck by the style of ordering- we paid and punched our orders into a vending machine outside the doors. Efficient and less human interaction- very Japanese. Going inside, the restos usually have just one long table that wraps around the kitchen area. Sitting down, we were immediately served water, soup & salad. Surprised by the quickness I looked up to thank the servers and was startled to find one person working. Just one person. Looking down and around the table I counted 7 customers, not including the 4 of us and another 2 coming in. The server amazingly and successfully served everyone! He seemed to glide between the meat grill, the rice cooker, the water pitcher, the vegetable steamer, the salad crisper, the dish washer... I leaned over the counter a bit to check if he was wearing roller skates or something. Nope. Just him. And his SUPERHUMAN SERVING ABILITIES.

6. Takoyaki. n. Literally fried or grilled octopus; a popular Japanese dumpling made of batter, diced or whole baby octopus, tempura scraps, pickled ginger, and green onion, topped with okonomiyaki sauce, ponzu, mayonnaise, green laver, and katsuobushi (fish shavings). Yea. We ate this A LOT.

And that about sums up the food highlights. And I should probably get to bed. I'm off again to Negros Island tomorrow afternoon! Good night, world! Infinitelove!

แล้วพบกันใหม่, ราชอาณาจักรไทย!

*See you later, Thailand!

I WILL return to Thailand. That isn't a question. The only question really is when. I've already started looking into English teaching programs, and I plan on setting aside a percentage of my income (once I get a job- eee!) for another visit to the Elephant Nature Park, this time for at least a week. Oh man, I'm getting so happy and excited just thinking about it! So yes, Thailand, I will see you later, hopefully in 2013!

But I'll finish up writing about my last day in Bangkok. (And then I'll finally get to Japan. Hopefully. Maybe? Ehhhh?) So my last day started out much like my first- eyes blurry from lack of sleep, and feeling disoriented from the traveling. Awesome! I sat in Chatuchak park for a while to collect myself, reading, writing & people watching. Joggers, children feeding pigeons, grandmas carrying baskets of produce to the nearby market, gorgeous trannies sashaying in their high pumps and talking about their evenings in alarmingly low voices... Yea, just another morning in the park.

I ventured over again to the market, wanting to see it in the day time. The bustling crowds, blaring music & noisy, smokey bar scene was replaced by vegetable & fruit carts and a quiet hum of early morning activity. I preferred this atmosphere over its nighttime counterpart. I meandered around, stopping every now and then to chat with locals. It was a simple and calm way to start the day.

In heavy contrast to this, afterward, I headed to Siam square. Siam square is a retail wonderland of malls & shopping galore in a busier part of the city. After the quiet, quaintness of the morning market, I was overwhelmed by the frenzied consumerism and upon arrival immediately sought shelter in a small coffee shop. With my thai iced tea (always delicious!), I sat next to a window to write more postcards and to people watch. There really does seem to be a skip in the Thai step. I could detect a general feeling of relaxed contentment not only in their faces, which seem to always be smiling or laughing, but in their body language. They walk with arms linked or holding hands, shoulders are relaxed, step paces are even & unhurried... They all just seem to lightly flow and weave on the sidewalk. It was amazing to observe such mellow and carefree energy in the streets, especially after seeing the craze of Tokyo and after living in fast-paced New York.

Finally leaving my safe haven, I got on a bus and headed to the Phra Nakhon district, a more historical part of town near the Chao Phraya River. Along this river are Bangkok's jewels and main attractions. With my unfortunately limited time, I only got to see three: Wat Arun (Temple of Dawn), Phra Borom Maha Ratchawang (the Grand Palace) & Wat Po (Temple of the Reclining Buddha).

I first stopped in Wat Pho. After getting briefly distracted by an adorable kitten who was playing along the temple's outside wall & rooftops, I took off my shoes and entered the main hall. (Because I was mistaken for Thai, I was led to a different entrance and didn't have to pay! Again! YES!) My admitted first thought was: "Wow, that's a really big nipple." Not too classy. But! My following thoughts were much more appropriate and appreciative of the beauty and awe in front of me. The walls were decorated in repeating designs of lotus flowers & swirling shapes. Echoing throughout the chamber was the sound of coins dropping & ringing in metal donation basins that lined the walls. The Reclining Buddha was enormous, measuring 46 meters in length & 15 meters in height. It was covered in brilliant gold plating from head to toe, the only exceptions being gorgeous mother of pearl on the eyes & on the soles of the feet. The feet featured intricate carvings of a spiral design on the toes and 108 propitious images on the soles. I don't think I've ever stared at someone's feet for so long. Well, maybe my own during awkward moments. So I guess I've never stared in awe at somebody's feet for so long.

Feeling the pull of the river, I left Wat Pho and walked towards the piers. Turning down a random street I found myself in a strip of stalls selling all manners of seafood- dried squid, fresh fish, fish balls, shrimp kabobs... Craving, of all things in this particular market, something sweet, I bought icecream from an adorable vendor with crinkly eyes & a ready smile. He topped the vanilla scoops with coconut jelly, chopped nuts & evaporated milk. It was easily the best 10 baht I had spent that day! I kept walking along the market pier, happily eating my icecream when I saw a sign advertising ferry rides. Why not? Down a series of planks, across a wooden & decaying platform, I hopped onto a boat and headed down the river to lord knows where. The water was energetic, but not in a dangerous way. The waves seemed playful, nudging and rocking the boat. I stood at the edge and watched the banks & moving scenery, loving the water.


Immediately catching my eye on the opposite bank was Wat Arun, which was by great chance where the boat ended up stopping. From afar it was impressive- a prang (Khmer-style tower) in the distance surrounded by 4 smaller prangs at the corners. Up close it was beautiful enough to make even the most heartless, stoic & passive person weep. Oceans. Forever. Once again, thinking I was Thai, the guard let me in for free. (This whole we-think-you're-Thai-so-here's-something-for-free thing never got old!) Every surface of the prangs were covered with giant mosaics of sculptures, porcelain pieces, seashells & colored stones embedded in the rock in intricate and repetitive designs. I climbed up steep steps that led to two terraces. On the topmost terrace, the view was breathtaking. It was a clear & breezy day and the sun was starting to set, bathing everything in a warm, orange glow. Surrounding the temple below were various buildings, old & traditionally built. The sun glinted off their tiled roofs and created a golden ribbon that snaked along the tops and into the horizon. Further beyond, I could see the shining roofs & spires of temples peeking through the seemingly endless urban sprawl. The voices of monks chanting & the sound of tinkling bells created a sweet hum of music and I suddenly became conscious of my breath, wondering if the monks below could hear my exhales in the serene quiet. It was at that moment that I knew that I would come back to Thailand. If not to explore & experience what I had not yet explored & experienced, then to relive this moment, because it was one of the greatest moments of my life. It was simple but sacred & I am so thankful that I got to experience it!

And that is how I ended my first trip to Thailand. I cannot wait for the next! I truly am a person bewitched & infatuated! Thailand, you RULE.

i left my heart in thailand.

My last few days in Thailand were amazing! I can confidently say that of all the countries that I've visited over the past few months, Thailand is easily my favorite. In addition to my great experience at the Elephant Nature Park, my last few days in Chiang Mai and Bangkok were absolutely beautiful in every sense of the word.

I was super sad after leaving the Elephant Nature Park. Although I had only been there two days, I had grown very attached to the elephants & the people, and I missed them terribly. (Honestly, can you blame me? I mean, they're ELEPHANTS.) To cheer myself up, I rented a bike from my hostel and spent the day riding around town. The road systems in Thailand are interesting but a bit confusing. They have main roads and then numbered smaller roads, sois, that branch off & sort of overlap with each other. I got lost pretty often and finally gave up on navigation altogether. In between temple visits (there are literally at least one every two blocks!), I stopped in a park in the afternoon to rest & write postcards. While there I met a lovely old man who talked to me about jazz and his dream of playing in a jazz band in New York's Central Park. He was a darling with a smile & laugh that extended to his eyes in crinkles. And his voice was low & gruff, with an almost sage-like quality. I half wished he had had a super long, white beard. Full of secrets.

With the bike I managed to explore a lot of the city. I got lost in small alleyways, avoided main roads, & tried to remember to stick on the other side of the street. It was a really great day and I hadn't realized how much I missed biking! It reminded me of living in the Bronx. And when I paused to journal in the park, sitting on a bench at the edge of a field with my bike parked next to me, I was painfully reminded of Fordham and sitting around Eddie's Parade. I got hit with a wave of homesickness that was only cured by more biking in the night streets. I'm such a homesick wimp. Boo.


The next day, instead of heading to back to Bangkok, I stayed in Chiang Mai for another day. Best decision ever! I traveled to Wat Phrathat Doi Suthep, a Buddhist temple located at the top of a mountain. With luck, I happened to meet another traveler who was also heading there. And! He had a motorcycle! Hooray forever! So I rode a motorcycle up a curving & twisting road that wound up the mountain! The day was beautiful and the wind in my face & hair felt wonderful. Once there, I was mistaken for being Thai, and so did not have to pay to enter! Score for ethnicity confusion! I climbed up the 309 steps to the temple proper, and I was vaguely reminded of the Great Wall. The stairs were bordered by two dragons, whose heads at the bottom were bejeweled & decorated with great detail & intensity, and whose bodies waved & flowed, covered in small, green & yellow scale tiles. It was beautiful and I ran my hand over the cool ceramic layers as I walked up. The temple was gorgeous! At its core was a huge, golden reliquary, which visitors walked around, palms pressed together, heads bowed in reverent silence. Golden Buddha statues were everywhere, with clay jugs for incense & flowers, and ornately decorated metal trays for candles set in front of them. Pilgrims bowed & knelt before these displays, murmuring or silently mouthing prayers. The air was filled with the soft sounds of bells tinkling & chiming, monks chanting, & feet gently slapping against the tiled floor. I found a spot to sit at the foot of a pillar and simply watched & observed. I felt so at peace. Before I left, I received a blessing from one of the monks. I knelt before him as he tied a piece of white rope around my left wrist, chanting. He then sprinkled me with holy water, saying another blessing. As I looked up, he fixed me with a gentle stare and placed his hand over mine. He said some words to me in English that I will carry with me forever.

Aaaaaaand I'm passing out. My flight from Bangkok to Manila got in at 4am this morning and I've been up since 8am or so to have breakfast with my Aunt. And I've been averaging about 4 hours of sleep a night for the past 2 weeks. So I'm tired. Whine whine whine. I'm sure my friends still in school and pulling all nighters like it's their job are snickering at my weakness. What can I say? I'm your average human being that needs sleep. You super-humans with your seemingly unlimited capacities for sleep deprivation are the weird ones. I'm not making sense. Okay. Good night, world!

a city of smells & sounds.

I think that's the best way to describe Bangkok. My ears & nose were constantly accosted by a melange of so many, too many things. Street pad thai, motorcycle engine rumbles & exhaust, chicken kabobs, peddlers yells to passerbys, car honks, pineapples & bananas, incense, prayer bell chimes... And yet they were never at odds with each other, somehow blending & harmonizing together to create the unique atmosphere of the city. I found it to be sweet & spicy, an observation that may be inspired by the cuisine.

I arrived in Bangkok to a warm & humid afternoon. I stumbled off the plane, still a bit tired & dazed from the lack of sleep that had started to add up. But I was still determined to start my Thailand adventure strong, so after navigating the public buses, and after a brief check in & break at my hostel, I went exploring. My first mission was to buy a bus ticket for the following evening to Chiang Mai. Unfortunately, the cheap price of my hostel translated to not-so-ideal location, and I was inconveniently far from the city center & the northern bus terminal. But thankfully Bangkok has a very intricate bus & metro system. As I've found with all public transit systems in the major Asian cities, the bus and train lines exist in a chaotically organized & efficiently tangled system. To a foreigner, they seem impossible to navigate, but through them you really can get anywhere. Just as long as you take the right train or bus and know where your stop is. In China and Vietnam, this information was extremely difficult to get from anyone, and I expected such difficulties in Thailand. To my wondrous surprise, this was not the case at all, thanks to the willing helpfulness of the locals.

Which brings me to the people. The people of Thailand were some of the friendliest that I've ever encountered on my travels! They were smiling, approachable, lively and seemed very happy. Any time I asked for directions, at least two people would jump to help me. And when they couldn't help me, or when they couldn't speak English, they would ask someone else nearby or in some cases call a friend! Even when I didn't ask for directions, whenever I stood on a street corner to consult my map, multiple Thais would offer assistance getting to wherever I was heading. Once, a guy even escorted me to my destination, even though it was a full 25 minute walk out of his way! It doesn't stop with helpfulness either. I had so many random, friendly conversations with Thais on my first day in Bangkok than I had in total during my first 2 months traveling abroad! Yea, I LOVED the people.

So with the help of a very kind Thai woman, I got to the bus terminal and bought my ticket. I explored the nearby area and I got to a huge, well-known night market called the Chatuchak (or J. J. to locals) market, located near a like named park. Over the next week, I discovered that night markets are the bees knees in Thailand, and J. J. is one of the biggest with 35 acres of over 5000 stalls & vendors. There were shops for everything- mugs, keychains, shoes, remote controls, custom shirts, sexy jean cut offs, you name it! It was a maze, crowded with people & the air was full of delicious smells of street food!

The next day, I walked and walked and walked! It was tiring but wonderful! My first objective was to buy a new camera battery charger, as I had misplaced mine somewhere in Japan, and I absolutely NEEDED one for the enormous number of photos I anticipated taking. I was pointed in the direction of Pantip Plaza. Pantip Plaza can best be described as a wonderland of electronics. It was 5 stories of huge floors, crammed from corner to corner with shops & stalls, selling everything from computers to hard drives, wireless mice to SLRs, etc. It was a pretty impressive and flashy sight, and I wished that I was more of a tech geek to truly appreciate the electronic mecca.

Seeking AC shelter from the heat, I then stopped in Platinum Fashion mall, where I made friends with a tranny named Kisses. She really was one of the most beautiful and delicate girls that I had ever seen. Needless to say, my self-esteem points dropped dramatically. It took me a while to get used to her very low & masculine voice, but she was great company, very sassy, sarcastic & funny. She gave me a dress from her clothing stall as a parting gift because she thought I was "as cute as a chipmunk". I got lunch with her & some other travelers, and they spent a large portion of it trying to guess what ethnicity I am. I got Japanese, Thai, Japanese-Spanish, & Chinese. I'm really starting to think I'm adopted.

Parting from them, I continued my wanderings. In between stretches of urban streets and daily life, I stumbled upon Wat Saket Phu Khao Thong (Golden Mount Buddhist Temple) & the Giant Swing. Wat Saket was awesome! It was a vision of white & gold with an impressive spire on the top; it was a distant mirage in the warm & smoggy haze of the afternoon. I climbed to the top by a staircase that spiraled up, bordered by fountains and greenery. On top, the view was amazing. I stayed there for almost 2 hours, enjoying the break from hectic city streets below. Looking down, that madness seemed so far away and I briefly entertained the idea of hiding out there for the rest of the day. Eventually, I climbed back down to wander some more, later running into the Giant Swing.

That night I hopped on my night bus to Chiang Mai. I felt like I was on the Knight bus in Harry Potter, just short of a chandelier on the ceiling. It was a bright purple double-decker, inside and out, with squishy seats that transformed into beds! And the driver was pretty crazy as well. Yea, I kind of geeked out and was so sad that I couldn't do so with any of the other passengers. Womp.

my new hero is a tiny thai woman.

And her name is Sangduen Chailert, but she's more affectionately known as Lek (means "small" in Thai, which is very appropriate for her tininess). In 1994 she began the Elephant Nature Park, an organization and place dedicated to providing a haven for abused and troubled elephants. But I'll talk more about that in a minute. First, I want to share what I learned about the plight of elephants in Thailand.

Although the elephant is a most revered creature & symbol in this country, it is surprising to learn of how little that reverence carries over from spiritual life to daily life. Elephants fall under two main categories: domestic & wild. As domestic creatures, owning an elephant is comparable to owning a dog or cat, and what few laws & regulations there are that protect them from owner-inflicted abuse are often not enforced. Most of these domestic elephants are put to work by their mahouts (pronounced "maa-hoot," means elephant driver or controller), either as laborers (although logging has been banned in Thailand since 1989) or as tourist attractions. In either case, most elephants are beat into submission when they are babies, undergoing torture for multiple days meant to break their independent spirits. Unlike training a puppy with rewards for good behavior, the elephants are instead punished for bad behavior. The punishments are brutal: being stabbed by nails at the ends of bamboo sticks (sometimes in the ear, where they have some of the most nerve endings), whipped, caged, starved, sleep-deprived, blinded... It's a terrible tradition that has existed for years and refuses to change with the times. Even when the creatures are finally broken, the hardships do not end. Most elephants are put to work in the city streets, forced to whore out their exotic appeal to tourists. The city streets are no place for an elephant- their feet are highly sensitive to quakes in the ground, so the constant rumble of cars and motorcycles is terrifying and accidents happen frequently. Also, the contraptions put on their backs to seat tourists are painful and destroy their skin, not to mention their spines. On top of all this, off duty they are usually not properly cared for. Adequate amounts of food are not provided, polluted sewage water is their main water source, and they are not shown nearly enough love and affection, which is even worse in the lack of a herd.

The cultural context must be taken into account though. Thailand is a developing country, with a huge gap between the rich and poor and little to no middle class to speak of. In this kind of society, it is understandable that the poor are driven to, or so it seems from the western perspective, extreme means of surviving, such as putting daughters into prostitution and in this case abusing elephants. It is easy to judge and tsk at such actions, but when faced with these cases of desperation and poverty, what choices do these people have? It isn't likely that they can go to the nearest homeless shelter and get help drafting a work resume. They can't exactly head to a bank and take out a loan for a small business. So they use what they have, and sometimes that's an elephant. And in terms of government intervention, while talking with one Thai, he argued that the plight of the elephant, although sad, is not a priority in a country where the economy is shaky, the infrastructure is crumbling, and the livelihoods of the people are dismal. These problems must be addressed first before the problems of elephants. Now, I'm in no way supporting the abuse or the continued abuse of elephants, but rather I'd like all sides of the story to be considered before damning all elephant owners. My knowledge is still pretty limited, so I'll write more about this aspect later when I know more.

There is a ray of hope though. In a natural valley tucked in the Northern mountains of Thailand near Chiang Mai is the Elephant Sanctuary. Since it's humble beginnings, it has helped over 30 elephants, restoring them back to health and giving them the life they deserve- far away from the commercial use of humans and back in nature. Unfortunately, returning them to the wild is not a viable option, as they have been raised by and have lived with humans for the majority of their lives, but the park creates a nice balance between these two existences. The elephants are given acres of land to freely roam, a river to bathe in, and a constant supply of food. There is a mahoot assigned to each elephant, but unlike the awful aforementioned definition of the mahoot-elephant relationship, these relationships are loving, carefully fostered and grown over time. Some mahoots will spend as long as a month with their elephant night and day in order to gain the elephant's trust. And given the background stories of each elephant, it's truly surprising that they have even come to trust humans at all. Jokia was blinded in both eyes by slingshots and hot pokers when she refused to haul logs because she had had a miscarriage. Another was drugged by hunters who, with a chainsaw, cut his tusks too close to his face, causing nerve damage and infection. And Mae Bua Loi was chained to a tree and forced to mate with an aggressive bull who stomped on her back, damaging it and breaking one of her legs, leaving her with a sagging limp. All of them have stories such as these, and it's heartbreaking to realize that there are countless others out there.

So, for the past 2 days I was at this park, helping and loving these elephants. I got to bathe them in the river (they're so cute and LOVE the water- they kept trumpeting gleefully the whole time, and one sprayed me with water before hugging me with her trunk, at which the mahouts freaked out because they thought she was trying to kill me... with LOVE), feed them bananas and squash, go on walks with them ... They were all so happy and smiley and it took so much self-control to not hug them all! I also fell in love with the people, the daily life, the energy, the park, the purpose & mission, and, of course, the food. Everyone was so friendly, offering smiles and welcome to all visitors and volunteers. As a bonus fun-tivity, I went tubing down the river which was AWESOME. I was terrified at first, y'know as I can't swim and all, but it was a blast, minus my almost floating down the river beyond our designated route and into rapids. I was laughing nervously the whole time while my Australian friend and my guide yelled to me, "Beans! Where on earth are you going!?" The later ended up heroically jumping into the dangerously swift (3 foot high) river and rescued me. Can't take me anywhere. Especially when the route involves a river. Moving on from my embarrassment, the food was a gigantic, vegetarian buffet of Thai cuisine. OMG. So. Good. The papaya salad was so spicy but so delicious that I just had to keep eating it, even as my guide Thep laughed at my spice-induced tears. It was easily one of the best experiences that I've ever had on my travels! My heart ached as I drove away from the park this evening (I almost extended my stay to a week, but woke up to the sad, sad reality that I couldn't afford it), and I cringed as green hills were replaced by scenes of neon signs and stores, but I comforted myself with the knowledge that I knew I'd be back someday. It's a beautiful thing that Lek has created, with a beautiful purpose and outlook for the future of elephants. If you're ever in Thailand, I strongly suggest you visit the park. They have day visits, as well as over-nights, week-longs, etc. available. Prices are admittedly a bit high, but 1. it's a great cause; 2. the experience is really, REALLY worth it; and 3. the park receives zero funding from the government and needs all the financial support it can get.

So yea. Chiang Mai, Elephant Nature Park, and Lek, you have all stolen my heart.

And now my laundry is done so time for some late night adventures in Chiang Mai (yay!) before I return to Bangkok tomorrow (BOO).

i feel like my life isn't real these days...

Really. I keep finding myself in places and situations where I have to stop and remind myself that this is actually happening and I better be completely present mentally and physically to remember it all.

So, I haven't updated in a while, for which I apologize. I hadn't realized that I had so many readers until you all emailed or messaged me demanding updates. Sorry! Japan was crazy-busy, with full days of adventure and food, and not a lot of down time for blogging and writing. And during my brief break back in Manila, I went to Tarlac to visit my relatives and Lola. So those are my excuses. I hope they are acceptable to you, my surprisingly demanding readers. :)

I'm currently in Chiang Mai, Thailand. I'm taking a few hours to rest and take it easy at the hostel because I sort of/almost fainted earlier this afternoon in a Buddhist temple. I'm okay! I promise. I think I'm just tired still from Japan, not to mention the night bus I took last night from Bangkok, on which one of the passengers was a guy who insisted on thinking aloud for the entire trip. He was speaking in Thai, so it was a bit easier to zone him out, but every now and then he'd exclaim something, jolting me from my sleep. Le sigh. Other than that though, I did enjoy the bus ride, my favorite part being waking up to the sun rising over tree covered hills passing my window.

I really adore Chiang Mai, and I've only been here a few hours. I've discovered a pattern in my affection for cities- the smaller and more rural they are, the more love I have for them. Bangkok was nice, but I was tiring of it. I think I've had my fill of hectic, major cities. They certainly are interesting and have their charms, but visiting one after another after another after another... they start blurring together and you begin to wonder what your thoughts sounded like, or silence for that matter. While I do like being in the wild and exciting (I mean, I lived in New York City for 4 years), I have a deep appreciation for the peaceful and quaint, and I think I might prefer those types of places over the former. Perhaps it's from living in largely urban areas my entire life... the grass is always greener, as they say.

In Chiang Mai, it's easy to get anywhere just by walking, which I lovelovelove. The less I have to rely on motorized vehicles, the better! I spent the better part of the morning wandering around aimlessly, my favorite way to travel. There are so many shrines and temples here, each similar to the next but with their own individual character and beauty. I didn't quite keep track of names, as there are literally SO MANY, but I left a prayer at each of them and tried to pay my respects. Delicate and intricate patterns are everywhere in the temples, and in Thailand in general. I stood staring at a door for about half an hour today, tracing the design with my eyes and puzzling other tourists with my fascination over a seemingly ordinary door. This particular pattern was very fine, and it might have been a trick of the changing light shining off the gold paint, but it seemed to ebb and flow on the wood. It's all so so beautiful and I can't wait to upload and share the photos with you!

But anyway, enough resting. Time to get back in the world of Chiang Mai!

P.s. I promise to write more about Japan and Bangkok later!